Driving home last evening we noticed several houses with holiday lights strung. It surprised me because most years we are one of the earliest to decorate, starting the day after Thanksgiving. Paul chuckled as I swore competitively each time we saw a sparkling house. I admit there was a temptation to get home and begin climbing the ladder to the overhead storage, we have headlamps for a reason, right? But Paul reminded me that today was Thanksgiving and that it was important to honor this day for the important day that it is.
In our house that is less about Plymouth Rock and more about the big rock that we all live on. For us, this is day for remembering the people, animals, places and things that we are grateful for.
I have found that as we navigate this new Covid-world, it has become important for me to look small. The big picture scares me. I accept the responsibilities of moving forward and finding a way to create a new normal, but if I take in too much at a time, it becomes overwhelming. There are a lot of things to be grateful for that can be found in our own microcosm each day.
Our life bulges at the seams and the sixteen waking hours we have in a day can feel just not enough. I'm doing the work of trying to slow things down, even momentarily, trying to be observant, mindful and grateful. Hauling water to the barn is now done in buckets, the hose is shut off for the winter. It will take me several months to get in sync with wearing gloves again so, for the time being, I'm hauling cold metal buckets and cold water sloshes over my bare hands. When I take the time to look up, I notice the sunshine angling through the conifers, I can see either small insects traversing the woods or watch snowflakes spin to the ground below. It doesn't take much time for me to stand still and see.
The thermometer is on its downward descent. When we walk into our house I am suddenly very aware of being enveloped into the warmth from the wood stove. I know that I can't appreciate the warmth until I experience the cold.
For my birthday this year, our sons wanted to have a special gathering, but it didn't seem safe for them to fly in from various parts of the country given the Covid-spikes going on. Instead they created a Zoom party and, as we opened Zoom - there they all were: our oldest, Michael and family, in birthday hats. Focus could have been put on the fact that this wasn't “live”, that it was merely a facsimile of the real thing. Instead, I moved my focus to a small space, to a computer screen where all of my sons’ beautiful faces smiled at me. Where they sang happy birthday and laughed and teased each other and me. My energy seemed better spent in gratitude than disappointment.
Today we will enjoy the traditions of the holiday; the wonderful smells of food cooking, the candles shining light on our festive table, and the pie....always the pie. I will grumble at the amount of dishes that need to be washed, even though Paul will be the one doing the washing. If I take the time to look small, everything will be made better for my bookmarking this day to really listen to my husband tell us a story, or to notice how our son, Josh, laughs merrily at every joke told. Suddenly there it is: we think happiness is eluding us but, it seems it has simply been hiding. Gratitude has revealed happiness.
My wish for you is a Thanksgiving Thursday filled with gratitude followed by a Friday with more of the same. Because, like pie, there is always room for more.
Melissa Perley